But it's not necessary

The biggest sucker deal in retail.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

really stupid

The Completely Pointless Personality Quiz
The Completely Pointless Personality Quiz

my color


You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive.

Find out your color at Quiz Me!

Dear Bayer, Dear Pfizer

   Dearest Bayer Pharm.,
I believe it may be time to return to shore. The ship has sailed, all the jokes have been made, and they aren't ever going to be called "Levitra Jokes". It doesn't matter how often you inundate my television with your wonderful, happy couple dancing, men skipping down porch steps, it ain't ... gonna ... happen. They were there first, and it sure is a lucrative market, the "I want an erection and can not achieve one naturally" crowd is the epitome of the term Maintenance Drug Customer. However awkwardly constructed that sentence was, I'm sure you get my drift. Diabetics may pay the bills, limpd**ks can make you rich! But, as I said, the mold has been cast, there is no going back, Viagra will always be the one getting free publicity every time one of those jokes is told. Here comes the part I want to address jointly to you and the fine folks of Pfizer:

    I have yet to have a problem getting one when I need one, but if that day comes I am aware there are pills I can get for the problem. You and I and the fencepost know that a representative from one or both of your fine companies has already paid a visit to my doctor, let's not kid ourselves. He will give me the sample from the company that most recently greased his smarmy paw with a golf weekend or free medical equipment. Either way, I am not going to be sitting on my sofa watching television waiting for someone to remind me there is a pill for it, right? Everyone on the planet that has access to a pill-pusher already knows, so save the advertising cash for the graft or print ads or whatever. I personally will make a point of buying the opposing product of the last one to intrude on my television enjoyment, if/when your pill ever becomes necessary for me. Thanks

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Did you ever think?

Did you ever think ... that your help is more hindrance than assistance?
Did you ever think ... that if you really want to help someone you ask them what you can do; you don't tell them how everything they are doing is wrong?
Did you ever think ... that your offer of help is more about belittling the
ability of those you propose to help than any supposed altruism?
Did you ever think ... that maybe, just maybe, giving a gift and then dictating
how it is used is not as much gift-giving as it is an attempt to control the recipient?
Did you ever think ... that helping someone for the sheer glory of mentioning it
at every opportunity isn't as much about being helpful as it is megalomania?
Did you ever think ... that people don't spend time with you not because they don't care about you, but more because of how bad you choose to make them feel about themselves?
Did you ever think ... that if you had ever been a friend, you might have some?
Did you ever think ... that people that have friends might have them for a reason, not just to choose them over you?
Did you ever think ... that maybe what you think is wrong?
Did you ever think ... that being silent waiting for your turn to repeat yourself isn't the same as listening?
Did you ever tell someone you loved them just to let them know; not to prompt them to say it back?
Did you ever love someone, just for who they were, not what you wanted to make of them?
Did you ever think ... even just once?